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Dating Tips for Single Parents
Dating for single parents is tough. You might feel like no one would want to date someone who has another person’s children. You might not have the money to spend on nice clothes, hair and the latest styles as someone who doesn’t have children at home. You’re probably exhausted from running the kids to soccer practice, back and forth to their other parents house, working all day, making dinners and lunches and sitting up late with a sick child. Who would want to date a wreck like you?
But don’t forget that being a parent contributes to the great person that you are. You’re responsible, caring and have empathy. The life experiences you’ve had as a mom or dad makes you more down to earth, you can roll with the punches better and know what it’s like to care for someone other than yourself. Let’s face it, to the right person, being a single parent makes you a great catch!
Online dating is probably one of the best thing to happen for single parents wanting to date. You can stroll through the ads after the kids are in bed wearing your mustard stained t-shirt and baggy sweatpants and no one will know the difference. All they will see, will be your fabulous profile picture. You can be in touch via email before you ever have to meet in person. They’ll know before you meet that you have children, so you both know what you’re getting into to.
Here are some more tips for dating as a single parent.
- Check out organizations that are specifically for single parents. Parent play groups or organizations like Parents without Partners are good places to start. Groups like this can be a great no-pressure way to meet other single parents and get to know them a bit better before deciding if you’re interested in dating or not.
- For a first date, consider going on a date for lunch or coffee if it’s too hard to schedule around work and the kids activities.
- Don’t talk too much about the kids at first, unless your date asks. Limit it to the basics at first. Names, ages, a tiny bit about them. If you go on more dates, you can talk a little more about them each time.
- If sudden changes come up due to sick children or baby-sitter no-shows, assess how your date deals with them. This can be a good indicator whether or not she or he is ready for a relationship with someone who has children.
- Don’t introduce your date to your children too early. This is often the biggest mistake dating parents make. Make sure you’re ready to commit on some level before letting your date meet the children. Kids form attachments really easily and it may be hard for them if you bring a new person into their lives every few months. This may send a message to your children that relationships don’t last and may affect how they attach to a partner that you do intend to stay around for a while.
- The best way to introduce your date to the family when it’s time is via a short activity, like getting ice cream or going to a movie. Make it light and simple. No weekend camping trips or vacations to Disney. Gradually increase the exposure over time.
- Don’t have sleep-overs at your house when the kids are at home until you are ready to get really serious, as in marriage or moving in togehter. If you’re planning on having sex with your date, do it at their house or at a hotel.
- If your children don’t like the person you’re dating, listen to their concerns. It may be that they don’t want a replacement for their mom or dad, but they might have something valid to say that you’re not seeing. Never force your kids to spend time alone with the person you are dating.
- Make sure you continue to schedule time with your children when you are dating. Don’t blow off a kid’s baseball game or play performance to go on a date. If possible, you should actually try to spend more time with your kids so they see that your affection for them is not going to change with this new person in your life. seeing. Never force your kids to spend time alone with the person you are dating.
- If the person you’re dating also has children, don’t introduce the two families too soon. You might have this great fantasy about how all the kids are going to get along swimmingly, and that may happen, but the stronger your relationship is, the greater chance you have of that happening. Wait until there’s a pretty strong chance of the relationship becoming permanent before you do so.
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